Fans of "World's Worst Poet" Seek to Honor Him
Jul 30, 8:37 AM (ET)
By BEN McCONVILLE
EDINBURGH, Scotland (AP) - The land that gave the world Robert Burns also has the dubious honor of producing the "world's worst poet." Now fans of the hapless William McGonagall are campaigning to put him in the pantheon of Scottish literary greats.
The late 19th century poet's work is so bad he carried an umbrella with him at all times as protection from the barrage of rotten tomatoes he faced wherever he recited.
His most famous work, a poem initially titled "The Railway Bridge of the Silvery Tay," drew derision from crowds when it required a hasty rewrite after the structure collapsed in 1879.
It became "The Tay Bridge Disaster" with the immortal opening stanza:
Beautiful Railway Bridge of the Silv'ry Tay!
Alas! I am very sorry to say
That ninety lives have been taken away
On the last Sabbath day of 1879
Which will be remember'd for a very long time.
More than 100 years after the poet's death, detractors still won't give him a break: The Scottish literary establishment has blocked plans for a memorial to him at the Writers Museum in Edinburgh alongside those honoring Robert Burns, Robert Louis Stevenson, and Sir Walter Scott.
"The decision to turn down a place for McGonagall was just snobbery pure and simple," said Bob Watt, chairman of the Edinburgh Friends of William McGonagall.
"These academics and arts big wigs don't like McGonagall because he's so accessible - he's the peoples' poet. To me he is one of the greats of Scottish literature. ... He endures to this day because he touches the lives of so many people. He's about laughter, some folk laugh at him while others laugh with him."
Despite his plodding verse and excruciating rhymes, McGonagall has remained in print since his death in 1902. He was branded the "world's worst" by his own publisher who put the epithet on a volume of his works.
McGonagall himself was confident of his genius, believing his poetry to be second only to that of Shakespeare.
Today fans keep the flame alive with regular recitals and their own version of a Burns Supper - the annual gatherings marking Burns' birthday that include prodigious consumption of Scotch whiskey. At McGonagall night, the meal is eaten back to front with the dessert first and ending with the starter.
On such evenings, devotees are likely to declaim vintage McGonagall verses such as: "Beautiful Moon, with thy silvery light/Thou seemest most charming to my sight/As I gaze upon thee in the sky so high/A tear of joy does moisten mine eye."
Neither McGonagall's home town of Edinburgh, nor his adopted city of Dundee, on the east coast of Scotland, has a statue to him - though both have plaques.
Scotland's literary and artistic vanguard The Saltire Society confirmed it had vetoed proposals to honor McGonagall with a slab in the courtyard of the Writers Museums in Edinburgh.
"His work appeals to people because it gives them a sense of superiority. This is mockery rather than appreciation. So-called fans are in fact cruel because they make fun of McGonagall's ineptitude," said Paul Scott, vice-convenor of the society.
Berlin Names Street after Rocker Frank Zappa
Jul 30, 12:12 PM (ET)
BERLIN (AP) - Berlin has named a street honoring Frank Zappa.
Zappa's brother, Bobby Zappa, said the Grammy-winning rocker, who died in 1993, would have been pleased, in a letter of thanks.
Frank-Zappa-Strasse or Frank Zappa Street - formerly Street 13 - lies on the eastern outskirts of Berlin amid empty industrial buildings in what was communist East Germany.
The street is home to Orwo Haus, a former Communist-era film factory that now provides practice studios for more than 160 bands.
Souveniers From Panda Poop
By AUDRA ANG
BEIJING (AP) - Nothing says "I love you" like a photo frame made from panda poop.
The Chengdu Giant Panda Breeding Base has come up with a dung-for-profit scheme that turns droppings from the endangered species into odor-free souvenirs ranging from bookmarks to Olympic-themed statues of the animals, state media and base officials said Monday.
The facility in the southwestern province of Sichuan houses about 40 bamboo-fed pandas who produce less than a ton of excrement a day.
"We used to spend at least 6,000 yuan ($770) a month to get rid of the droppings but now they can be lucrative," Jing Shimin, assistant to the base director, was quoted as saying by the official Xinhua News Agency.
Law Enforcement: This Week's Corrupt Cops Stories
http://stopthedrugwar.org/chronicle/495/police_drug_corruption
A Michigan narc is accused of making off with a whole bunch of blow, an Alabama juvenile probation officer is accused of snitching for the bad guys, a Massachusetts trooper takes a plea in a pain pill ring, and a Missouri cop goes to prison for ripping off drug couriers. Let's get to it:
In Detroit, a Detroit narcotics officer was suspended July 19 for allegedly stealing 13.2 pounds (six kilograms) of uncut cocaine from the department's evidence room. Detroit Police Chief Ella Bully-Cummings did not identify the officer, saying he had not yet been charged with a crime, but she did say he had access to the evidence room and was suspected of replacing the coke with another substance. The stolen dope was valued at $2.4 million, she added.
In Tuscaloosa, Alabama, a juvenile court probation officer is accused of taking bribes in exchange for tip-offs on police activities. Fayette County Juvenile Court Probation Officer Denny Driver, 37, was charged with one count of bribery Tuesday. Officials were tight-lipped about what Driver allegedly told to whom, but he was arrested after an investigation by Fayette County Sheriff Rodney Ingle, Fayette Police Investigator Ronald Stough and Drug Task Force agent Mark Allison. Driver has now been fired and awaits an August 13 preliminary hearing.
In Worcester, Massachusetts, a state trooper pleaded not guilty July 19 to charges related to his role in an Oxycontin ring. Trooper Mark Lemieux, 49, a former member of the Bristol County District Attorney's Drug Task Force, is accused of conspiring with his ex-partner in the state police, his live-in girlfriend, and a hired gun to distribute the popular pain reliever from June 2006 to May 2007. He was a task force member from 2002 until December 2006. Lemieux and crew went down after a supplier they had contacted got busted and agreed to wear a wire. Charging documents say police have Lemieux twice picking up money from the dealer while in uniform and in an unmarked police car.
In St. Louis, a former suburban St. Louis police sergeant got four years in federal prison July 20 for his role in a cocaine conspiracy. Former Hillsdale Sgt. Christopher Cornell, 45, was indicted along with five other St. Louis-area men is what prosecutors called a conspiracy to distribute cocaine throughout the metropolitan area. Members of the group confessed to plotting to rip-off low-level drug runners by arranging for shipments to pass through Hillsdale, where Cornell would pull them over and take their drugs. He copped to one count of use of a communication device to facilitate a felony.
